Yesterday afternoon the knee situation took another bad turn. Just before leaving the house to see my afternoon clients I got a call from the orthopedics office informing me that my doctor has been "called into surgery" for Friday and has to reschedule. Their earliest appointment is next Thursday. I responded to this news as any rational adult would under the circumstances and began to cry right then and there on the phone. The woman calling was very nice about it and sympathetic but couldn't do much to help me.
They did arrange for my doctor to call in a prescription for painkillers. We have plenty of those around here, left over from when I was going through the Taxol part of chemotherapy and from a tooth extraction I had (also during chemo), so I declined.
Here's where things stand now. I have the appointment with my usual doctor for next Thursday and an appointment at another practice about 15 minutes from here for Monday. This other practice is also supposed to call me right away if they have a cancellation today. We're having a snowstorm so I was optimistic that this would happen-so far no luck.
I've finally given in and taken some Vicodin. This is a last ditch thing with me. I don't like how it makes me feel but at the point I'm at I seem to feel better with it (woozy, kind of out of it) than without it (like I'm going to flip out and throw some kind or pain/tension/stress tantrum). I also took an Advil which really I shouldn't take (burns holes in my stomach) but is what really works. I can get away with taking one occasionally as a last resort. If I could take something like this or aspirin regularly I would never get to where I am now. Oh well...
I've canceled my clients for the day, the fire's going in the woodstove, snow is falling steadily outside, the dogs are sleeping, and the plumber who arrived at 8 this morning is almost done fixing the pipes under our bathroom sink.
I've made a little nest for myself here on the loveseat by the woodstove- pillows, a down throw, some green tea, and a pile of books. The new books I have include, "Anti-Cancer: A New Way of Life," by David Servan-Schreiber, MD, PhD, which I bought myself as a birthday gift last month, and "The China Study," by T. Colin Campbell and Thomas M. Campbell, a birthday/Christmas gift from Anna. Hopefully I'm not too Vicodin addled to read them. I'm also hoping to put together some recipes and meal plans for the next couple of weeks. I was thinking I might do some for Anna too, since she's also been overbusy and tired.
I find that the key to staying on track with my food and nutrition goals is to plan and organize meals and snacks ahead of time. When things get hectic, as they have been for the past couple of weeks, it's easy to find myself drifting into less than optimal eating behaviors; this can then lead to me worrying, which of course leads to more stress. Since I haven't been able to exercise at all for the past two weeks, staying on track with my eating is even more important than usual. I've been able to do a little bit of yoga and stretching, but that's about it. It will be so great to be able to walk again. In the meantime...